FROM MOMS:
I take him along on our Saturday errands. The car is the best place to talk! And it's very important to leave the younger siblings at home. We have lots of great talks this way.
D.R.C., New York
We used to rush in the morning to meet my daughter's bus. Then one day I realized that if I went into work just 30 minutes later, I could drive my daughter to school myself. So that's what we do - now we have more time at home for a quick breakfast together and then we spend about 25 minutes in the car together. I always try to make the most of this time, leaving openings for her to talk to me about what is on her mind, and thankfully, she does this. She really doesn't miss the bus ride, either!
M.J.P., Connecticut
We talk every day. She usually opens up to me at bedtime, when all is quiet and we're putting the day away. She wants to talk to me then, to sort of tie up the loose ends from her day. I enjoy this time, too.
J.M., New York
I hate to admit this, but we go shopping! She loves to shop for clothes even more than I do, so we have lots of fun. We put some limits on ourselves before we go, and we usually have lunch together at the mall. By the way, we have to go to a mall far from home so that we don't run into her friends. It's worth the longer trip to get away from the local scene and just spend time with each other.
B.F., California
We went to "clown school" together and then practiced our new talents together at fundraisers, birthday parties, nursing homes, and nursery schools. We did this for years, until my daughter was no longer interested. It was a good way to spend quality time together and do some community service at the same time.
S.R.L., New York
We're writing and illustrating a series of children's books together. This project has been ongoing for a couple of years. We've only actually done one complete book, but we have the ideas and outline for the others. The stories are about our cats. I am the writer and my daughter is the illustrator. We'll see where it leads - for now it's just an excuse to spend time together. I'm enjoying it.
I.M., Maryland
I make purposeful attempts to nail down periods of time for serious dialogue. It has to be a conscious thing. Even mealtimes don't always work because we're not always all in the house together, and family members are rushing off to the next activity. And the important thing is to be alone. It's like making a date with them.
T.T., New York
Cheng Hernandez 12/15/10
It is very important to spend time with your kids and connect with them. This way parents can understand how their child feels and think. As children grow older, they start to be curious and test their decision making. Especially when they reach teenage years, children have the tendency to become quiet, aloof and introvert. Sometimes, they feel misunderstood and when confronted they become aggressive and wild in their behavior . Parents should understand that when things go out of control, they need not be helpless. They can seek professional help and check out info on wilderness treatment programs . Start spending time with your kids. It can help them now and in the future.
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