You Want To Do What?!!! A Parent's Guide to Body Decoration
Doina S.'s daughter was 14 when she wanted her belly button pierced. So Mom and Dad went with her to meet the guy who was conducting the piercing, had him show them his sterilization method, the procedure was done, and they thought that was the end of it.
But a few years later, her daughter announced she was getting a tattoo, and Doina wasn't thrilled. "It's hard for a mom to see something that's 'perfect' getting marked up," says Doina, 38, a mother of three and owner of a health and wellness spa in southern Nevada. "I figured that part of growing up and becoming independent is making choices. She has always been sensible and we trusted her." And the result?
"I hate her tattoo," says Doina of the unicorn stomping on the moon on her daughter's lower back. "You might as well poke me in the eye."
Indeed, when it comes to body decoration, teens are often from Mars and parents from, well, Earth. Parents generally aren't fond of the idea of marking up their babies with tattoos, piercings, and strange dye jobs.
Yet body decoration is no longer the domain of sailors, tribesmen, and the "bad kids"-even the "good ones" want them. Why? "They do it to stand out and be different," says Pamela Cantor, Ph.D., a lecturer in psychology, Department of Psychiatry, The Cambridge Hospital, Harvard Medical School in Massachusetts, who treats adolescents, "just as you might make a statement by wearing all black and being Goth."
Debbie Forrester, Memphis, TN 10/01/08
OK, I know I'm going to get a lot of flack about this one, but I am taking my son next summer to get a tattoo for his 16th birthday. He has to adhere to the strict guidelines I have imposed (i.e., can't be anything derogative, has to be in a place where it can be hidden (such as shoulder, upper arm, etc., and I have to go with him). I have 3 tattoos... and I didn't get them until I was over 35! They are all discreet and tasteful. I love them and so does everyone else who sees them. Before you judge me, I have to add that I am a professional in the legal industry and definitely don't portray the image of a "tattoo type". My son also has type I diabetes, and I have spoken to his endocrinologist who gave me the ok. One thing that is important for parents to know about tattoos - there are several states that do not allow them on minors under the age of 18, even WITH parental permission. We happen to live in one of those states, so I am taking him to get his during our annual beach vacation in Alabama. There are also strict laws that tattoo shops must adhere to. Of course, there are always exceptions to every rule. The key is to do your homework, check out the tattoo artists and TALK to your kids. Sometimes there are far larger battles to fight.
Read more comments