Question:
My son (just 16 years old) is having phone sex with his out of state girlfriend (just 15 years old). My husband and I spoke to him about our concerns. He told us that he has known his girlfriend for a long enough time and that he is ready for this step. He did tell me that they remain virgins.I'm not sure how concerned we should be about this. Please advise. Thank you.
Answer:
ParentingTeensOnline expert, Martha R. Roper, M.A., has been a nationally known health and sexuality educator for 25 years. She answers:
As always, it is good to be concerned about your children, and it’s also wise to seek the opinions of experts. Since “Phone sex” can be anything from kisses to simultaneous masturbation, it is hard to know exactly what we are talking about here. Whatever behavior is occurring is certainly safe in terms of pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections. If you are worried about the explicit erotic sexually stimulating part of the conversation, then you probably want to let those images go and accept that your son is a sexual being. You might worry, too, if he were not having sexual thoughts and behaviors at this age. Trying to talk with your son about this might be too personal and embarrassing for him, so you might take opportunities to make reassuring comments about the fact that it’s normal to have sexual thoughts. You might direct him to Advocates for Youth, I Wanna Know and Planned Parenthood for information about preventing pregnancy and STI’s.