Question:
My daughter will turn 16 in Feb. and is struggling in the 10th grade. We recently moved from WA to NV and she has not taken the move well. So, in that regard; she had some real medical issues but also made up some that caused her to miss a lot of school. Feeling some what guilty for her not liking her new home; I feel that I'm partly to blame for not forcing the importance for school attendance though I have tried! We are in counseling to come to terms with the move, but my question is should she change schools so that she has more chance of understanding her classes? She complains that the teachers aren't that helpful.Answer:
ParentingTeensOnline expert Donna Secor Pennington, LMSW , has been a school social worker at the high school level for twenty years and an advocate for programs and services for teens and parents. She answers:
Changing schools is difficult for adolescents, both academically and socially. School attendance issues related to medical problems also present a difficult challenge or parents and teens. Families do move, however, and all parents make mistakes. Time spent feeling guilty only takes away time and energy that can be used to develop solutions. Your involvement in counseling is an important step in the right direction.
Yet another school change at this point could make your daughter’s situation worse. Students tend to display similar patterns of academic performance from one school to the next. A better approach would be to arrange for a meeting with your daughter’s counselor or school social worker and, if possible, her teachers, to clarify the various challenges she has faced and develop an action plan. High school teachers are not always very familiar with each student’s situation and may not be aware of the impact of your move and her medical issues. When a student is frequently absent, teachers may erroneously conclude that the student just doesn’t care. When teachers do understand, they are most often very willing to help.