If Your Child Tells You She Is Pregnant

• Take a deep breath. Try not to be immediately angry or despairing. Your child needs support and information. Listen to what she has to say.

• Encourage your daughter to see a doctor, family planning clinician, or counselor right away. In addition to confirming the pregnancy, these sources can help your daughter to explore all of her options.

• Arm yourself with information. Get the 411 on all of the options and laws that relate to pregnancy, abortion, adoption, and parental rights. Your child is going to have to know about them.

• You will have many feelings about this, so get outside help. You may want to see a counselor or therapist, too!

Making the Most of Your Parental Influence

• Stay close with your kids and talk to them about your values.

• Ask questions to find out how they feel about responsibility and how they define a healthy relationship.

• Make sure they have all the facts—that they understand how pregnancy can occur, and that they have alternatives to abstinence should they decide to become sexually active.

• Go see “Juno” (or “Waitress” or “Knocked Up”) with your children. Ask them how they would feel if a friend became pregnant.

• Listen to your teens. Sometimes we don’t give them enough credit. They have a lot to teach us.

Logan Levkoff, Ph.D., has her doctorate in Human Sexuality, Marriage, and Family Life from NYU and is the author of Third Base Ain’t What It Used To Be. She serves on the Advisory Board of ParentingTeensOnline.

 

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Issue: April 2008