Comments

• Sandra Kemp, MS 11/10/08

  Our kids have an allowance (not much, just $1 per day); they have daily chores (dishes, set table, feed animals) and weekly chores (clean room, bathroom, vacuum, fold clothes) that are divided up to be done. If they complain they lose 25 cents; if they don't do them and have to be told, they lose 25 cents; if they don't get up with their alarm clocks are aren't ready to walk out the door to catch the bus on time, they lose 25 cents; if they lie to us they lose 50 cents. There used to be a lot of complaining, but then we just would walk over and write "minus 25" on their chart, look at them, if they kept on we'd write "minus 25" again.... the complaining has stopped. Believe it or not, most weeks our 14 year old son and 11 year old daughter only lose about 75 cents each!

• DAWN greer, Centerville, IN 10/29/08

  My newly teenage daughter would not straighten her room up what so ever-grounding, privileges taken away, it didn't matter. The only way it was getting done was if I came back every hour to check on her. Finally I grabbed a book and went to her room. There she is sitting on the floor pouting. I calmly made her bed, stacked up pillows, sat down on the bed, told her to clean the room, and began reading. She wanted me to leave her room but I told her I couldn't until she had it cleaned. Now there is no problem! Any time she starts letting it get too cluttered and won't clean I start to make her bed and she jumps up right away and has it spotless in 1/2 hour or so!

• Lilith Durham, Jonesborough, TN 07/20/08

  Alicia & Jossie, I had the same problem until I realized that when I gave a command and folded my arms (so the culprit realized I wasn't going to go away anytime soon), the job actually got done! It takes just as much time to stand and supervise as it does to do it yourself, but it serves three other purposes as well: the job gets done to your satisfaction, the 'culprit' learns the correct way to do the job thereby eliminating the tired excuse "I don't know how!", and you can provide positive feedback and encouragement as the job is getting done. Less energy for you, your child/husband learns more responsibility, and when Mama's happy, everybody's happy. :)

• Stephanie Coviak, Cuyahoga Falls, OH 07/12/08

  The laundry is a perfect responsibility for kids, with no consequences for you if it's not done. My kids started when they were about 12. Sometimes they wear their cleanest dirty clothes. Every year around his birthday, I talk with my son about adding another responsibility in order for him to learn to take care of himself eventually. Once he tried to argue that he already knew how to do something, but I countered with doing a daily task on a daily basis is a very important skill.

• Stephanie Kaufman, Mine Hill 07/10/08

  I love the idea about the wheel. We have a chart and it changes every 2 weeks. I feel that it does take time to teach the children the right way to do chores and it can be frustrating for all especially when it is a Saturday and you want to relax, but I know that if I take the time now, it will pay off when they are older and know how to keep their home. That is key!

• Margaret HOlm, Ithaca, NY 07/08/08

  I think that as long as there is a consequence -- such as not going anywhere Friday night if the chore is not done -- helps a great deal. I know it has motivated my teens to do the chores I ask of them.
  I remind them of the consequence if they are not cooperative, then follow through with the given consequence. I find my teens become fairly cooperative with this approach.

• Jossie Wilbanks, Weesatche 07/06/08

  I agree with Alicia. It is most often easier to do the chores myself than try to get anyone else to do so. Not that I have energy all the time. I work a full time job and still have to do everything myself. Is there any hope?
  

• Maria Robreno 07/02/08

  Ever since my daughter started thinking about how she looked, and wanting matching outfits, etc. she does her own laundry. This was great. I’m thinking about getting a puppy since my son is crazy about animals and I bet he’d feed and walk a dog, even though he won’t take out the garbage. I think if the chore means something to them, there’s a reason for doing it.

• Cynthia Evansville 07/01/08

  We have a system with a wheel that rotates every week. Whatever name comes up next to the chore, that person has to do it. Some are easy, some take more time. People complain but they know they have to, so they do it.

• Alicia Dukame 07/01/08

  I’d like the writer of this article to come over to my house and try to get my kids to walk the dog (and pick up after him!), do the dishes, put the laundry away, etc. It’s just impossible. I know if I want it done I have to do it myself—not a good solution but the only one. I can’t get my husband to do chores either!